Paul McKenna “I can make you thin” Review – Day 4

This is my first attempt to follow the Paul McKenna “I can make you thin”‘ principles. This attempt didn’t succeed. I tried again in March 2009, and this time it worked. If you want to read the successful trial, click here.

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Two good things today: 1st of all, I got my first comment, after only three days! It’s very encouraging… Moreover, it seems that I’ve inspired someone to give it a try. That thought makes my day! Second, I looked at myself in the mirror today and thought “you’re starting to look good”, even though I still have my man boobs (lol) and my love handles… I looked at them but still, couldn’t help but think that I started to look good. Don’t read any vanity into this; it’s just that I’m so used to tell myself: “your body is ugly” that I felt quite surprised to hear in my head that my body looked good.

I have left Paris for a few days and am now in Geneva, where the temptation to binge on cheese fondue is always there! Let’s see how the PMcK method helps me here.

Yesterday, I mentioned that I got stressed about a job interview and hence I had my food “crisis”. I want to take a moment to talk about the relationship between job search and eating patterns I’ve had in the past few months. Let’s talk about the context first: I just completed a graduate degree program. A few months ago, some companies came to recruit on campus and it was a very busy time. My companies of choice did not recruit me, so I felt depressed about it and ate a lot. Then yesterday, I said I was stressing about an interview preparation, and I had a binge incident. Today, I’ve received an email from a recruiter who said he’s very interested in seeing me. I was very excited because that job is exactly the type of things I’d like to do, so I felt celebratory and my body jumped up and took a few steps towards the kitchen. Fortunately, it was only a few steps and I was able to check with my real hunger feelings to conclude that I wasn’t actually hungry. My point is: no matter what feeling it is (joy, fear, disappointment), if it is a strong feeling, my reflex is to overeat. I would consider this trial a successful one if PMcK method is indeed efficient in helping me get rid of my emotional eating (I did good today, but it’s too early to say, we’ll see on day 30!)

For those who don’t know the book, it comes with a CD, which is basically a recording of McKenna doing a hypnotic induction. I fall asleep almost everytime I listen to it- though a couple of times I stayed awake throughout the entire recording, and I can guarantee there was no sketchy suggestions 😉 Anyway, I’ve been listening to it everyday, it takes 25 minutes of my time. It’s too soon to say about the effects, but maybe the “i’m looking good” thing happened today thanks to this CD.

Later in the afternoon, I was really bored. Usually, I would have eaten. Instead, I did… nothing, which kept me bored. But at least, I don’t feel guilty for binging. Quite the opposite actually.

9:30 pm: maybe it’s ok to be bored sometimes.

I’m not saying people should aspire to be bored, but tonight, I am thinking that it is not the end of the world if I’m bored, that I don’t need to break it by eating food, or drinking alcohol profusely, or whatever- If I get a better idea to break it, I’ll happily get out of it. Otherwise, I’ll just get some rest or watch a film. I have always considered boredom to be a personal failure, so I guess I’m seeing things differently tonight.

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