In response to “A canadian reader”

hi… so I finally got some time to sit down and continue the discussion started last week about “how to eat only when you’re hungry.” Wendy, also known as “Canadian Reader” here, posted a long reply to this discussion on her blog, called “the red leather boots syndrome.” Thanks for sharing such an intimate story, and it resonated with me in many different ways.

Since the long term goal of this discussion is to ultimately help people find a positive appreciation of food again, and be able to eat when they’re hungry, and stop eating when they’re not hungry, I’ll share the thoughts that go in that directions.

First of all, good job for opening the can of worms, and digging  out the stuff from the past that may influence your eating habits today. Articles and books that I have read on the topic of being overweight often suggest that this “syndrome” is often rooted in the past, especially childhood. I tend to believe this, and I think I am no exception to this rule. In a way, I envy Wendy to have so much clarity and to have been able to shed such a bright light on how her eating patterns are influenced by the past. In my case, I think this is where I must dig, but I have no clue how the past is influencing me today. Well, I know that it did make me want to be self-destructive, but I do not know the psychological mechanisms at work behind it.

All I know today, is that the past doesn’t need to be fully solved and understood to re-develop a healthy relationship to food. Of course, if it was, I think the challenge would be easy. But I know that I didn’t have to gain full clarity on my background in order to re-develop a healthy relationship to food, and to remove self-destructive behaviours (cf, the non-alcohol 30 day trial)… I even think that because I have removed the means of escapism (and this month, I’m taking care of overspending, and trust me, this is another scary situation that I will tell more about later) I will now be able to work on removing the negative influence of my past on my life today.

The reason why I am saying this, is that for a long time I have thought: “well, until I haven’t figured out the past completely, I will not improve”. And I have discovered that it’s not true. Now that I have accomplished my latest 30 day trial, I know that I am capable of sustaining this way of eating for an extended period of time, and it will take me less effort to go back healhty habits… Today, I have figured out that no matter where I stand, no matter how much clarity I have, I can make steps towards a more positive life, and I can be the artisan of the kind of existence that appeals to me more.

Advertisements

2 Responses to “In response to “A canadian reader””

  1. A Canadian Reader Says:

    B,

    I’m deeply touched by your response. Thank you. I came across it just as I was thinking about having a snack and after reading it, realized that I wasn’t really hungry. It’s amazing what positive reinforcement can do!

    I think you’ve said something very profound in your post–something that can help all of us: “All I know today, is that the past doesn’t need to be fully solved and understood to re-develop a healthy relationship to food.” As someone who tends to be very analytical, this is a breath of fresh air.

    People who are totally oblivious to the underlying motivation behind their behaviour can sometimes be shocked into action when they finally understand why they do what they do. But interestingly enough, those of us who DO understand (or at very least, seek to understand) these motivations, need to actually PUT THEM ASIDE and get on with life in order to make the changes we need! Perhaps, the quintessential example of the “analyzer” who get never gets past analysis is Woody Allen, wouldn’t you say? I really don’t want to lead a Woody Allen-like life, although I really enjoyed his movies of the 70s and 80s.

    I also like the way you describe taking control of the future (being “the artisan of the kind of existence that appeals to me more”). I appreciate the way you have phrased it. So often, people just talk about positive thinking while your use of the word “artisan” conveys a sense of action, rather than just reflexion.

    À la prochaine,

    Wendy

  2. thirtydaytrials Says:

    good stuff

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: